Senators Snowe and Collins Order Giant Custom Strap-Ons to “Finish the Job”

Senators Snowe and Collins Order Giant Custom Strap-Ons to “Finish the Job” WASHINGTON — Coming off the Senate passing the National Defense Authorization Act (NDAA), which allows US citizens to be arrested,…

It’s Christmas at Guantanamo

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Police Planning a Major Crack Down on Organized Encampments!!

Mayors and Police officials from over 2500 cities and towns across america collaborated this past weekend on logistics to break…

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THE look for fall: Nouveau Douchebag

THE look for fall: Nouveau Douchebag

Hello Boys! Grab your Ed Hardy shirt, bathe in Abercrombie and Fitch cologne, drop your pants to your knees, and roll those 20″ rims on your purple Ford Focus – douchebaggery is in for Fall!…

What 4th of July means to Maine

What 4th of July means to Maine Well thank you Maine senate for passing a law so I can finally get fireworks…

Time Management Tips for Mainers

Time Management Tips for Mainers

Seems like everyone in Maine is busier than a four dollar Lisbon Street crack-whore. So what’s a busy Mainer to do to manage their time? Top time management tips for Maine residents…

Senators Snowe and Collins Order Giant Custom Strap-Ons to “Finish the Job”

Senators Snowe and Collins Order Giant Custom Strap-Ons to “Finish the Job”

WASHINGTON — Coming off the Senate passing the National Defense Authorization Act (NDAA), which allows US citizens to be arrested, held for life, and tortured by the military without charges, recourse, or a trial – Senators Olympia Snowe and Susan Collins have ordered custom gigantic…

Senators Snowe and Collins Order Giant Custom Strap-Ons to “Finish the Job”

Senators Snowe and Collins Order Giant Custom Strap-Ons to “Finish the Job”

WASHINGTON — Coming off the Senate passing the National Defense Authorization Act (NDAA), which allows US citizens to be arrested, held for life, and tortured by the military without charges, recourse, or a trial – Senators Olympia Snowe and Susan Collins have ordered custom gigantic…

Lewiston Elects Fattest Angriest Mayor Ever!

Lewiston Elects Fattest Angriest Mayor Ever!

LEWISTON — In a stunning slim [ha ha] victory over a dead guy, the city of Lewiston, Maine (stabbyest city in Maine) elects enraged, corpulent candidate Bob MacDonald. Despite his obvious dietary predilection, MacDonald has no relationship with the actual restaurant McDonald’s. On Tuesday, the…